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Posted By: Ashley
Date: Monday, 7 November 2005, at 1:20 p.m.
Well... Ive been belimic for about 2 weeks and I havent lost a pound? I feel terrible all my friends are mad at me and they keep telling me Im going to die eventually? Great friends eh? But I think in the long run it was be great because I will be beautiful and skinny! Im not fat at all but I just want to look good and this is the only way I can do so without going on one of those strict diets or not eating at all? I feel like I have two identities; one is this beautiful girl who loves like and is smart and funny and skinny and fun to be around then the other girl is a type who calls her self fat and is too self conscience and tells herself shes a fat cow then goes and shoves her finger down her throat to make herslef happy? Do I like being belimic? NO?! But its the only way to become the way I want? It seems that by now I am totally brainwashed and everytime I see myself in the mirror I only see a fat person? My friend told my that Im being selfish and vaine and that I dont care about any one but myslef but that isnt true? I dont need there help? I dont want it I fine and they just dont seem to understand that? If you feel the way I do like your living duel identities please im me or email me at SDSdancer101 or SDSdancer101@aol.com plz I would love to here what you all have to say!!
Ashley (SDSdancer101@aol.com), Jacksonville, FL
Tuesday, February 22, 2005 at 16:32:00
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